I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
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