I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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