So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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