I bet he comes in French.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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