I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
