Is it normal to miss your booty call?
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
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