Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
