Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
