i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
