Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
