i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
