I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Dicks are not precious.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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