seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
