I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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