At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
