Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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