Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
