please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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