There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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