Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
