so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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