I seem to have left my pride at pride
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
