What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
