I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
