Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
