I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
