that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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