Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
