You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
