I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Randomize
