Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
