margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
