Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Randomize
