We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
