mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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