Your mouth is God's brothel.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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