2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
