Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
