It's Friday. Sex?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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