it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
