TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
