i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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