U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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