he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
