im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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