if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
