I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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