i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
