I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
