Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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